Saturday, June 18, 2011

Getting over the fear...

One of my biggest fears in teaching yoga (yes there are a few) is that fateful day when my teacher Tiffany Cruikshank walks into one of my classes as a student....to have ME teach them. The thought of it brings swarms of butterflies to my belly. I guess it is pretty foolish to think that in my travels and teaching I wouldn't come across some of my more distant teachers. Those teachers whose blogs I follow, videos I watch, talks I listen to. They're kind of like unicorns to me. I know they're out there prancing about with their manes and silvery horns, and I know I'll meet one someday, but you know...they're unicorns. I see photographs of these teachers, read this or that article, but I've never met or even been in the same room with most of them. And when I am I of course realize that they are just like me, a perpetual student, passionate about what they do and full of love.

The thought never crossed my mind that one day I might actually be face to face with one of these elusive creatures...until today. As the storm outside blew in I struggled with the sliding doors to let a rain lashed lady in. Once her hair blew out of her face I couldn't mistake those bangs and all black get up. Who else would wear all black in Mexico? Sadie Nardini, all smiles. Introductions were had and then the question...
Sadie, "Are you teaching tonight?"
"Yeah, for the last day of Bikini Boot Camp."
"Awesome! Can I come to class?"
"Of course!"
Cue me running away feeling like I want to vomit, explode, pee.

After about 5 minutes that feeling went away and was replaced by one of honor and gratitude. It's less of a star-struck attitude and more of a deep sense of gratitude and thanks to those, unbeknownst to them, who have influenced me. It's scary teaching those who have taught you most of what you know. I look at this as an opportunity to conquer another fear and grow as both student and teacher. Thank you universe.

Besides...what a fan-freaking-tastic way to end my stay here. Sadie has been an inspiration to my practice and my teaching. Tonight she flows with me and tomorrow I fly with her. I can't wait!!!


1 comment:

  1. how cool! teaching my teachers always was the hardest thing to do in my teacher trainings, etc. never felt quite like my comfortable self in front of magical creatures such as unicorns :)

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